grumpy mum

tonight i felt like the grumpiest mum. i'm tired - a killer for me. when i'm really tired i have a short fuse and cant cope with mess or chaos or crying or whining or being ignored. i need lots of sleep to be good, relaxed, patient, gentle, fun, creative, smiley mum. and i feel terrible on the days when i'm trying but i snap. i'm tired for a good reason. Sam and i went to the cinema last night to see "Rust and Bone." it is a beautiful french film and typically french - slow, disturbing, impending tragedy through the whole film, phenomenal acting and great characters. it is raunchy and violent, tender and gentle. 

despite my bad exhausted mood and grumpy-mummy-guilt, here are three things i feel pleased about at the end of today:

• i went out with my lovely husband last night and saw a great film which has inspired and stimulated my mind all day
• we made 12 meters of christmas wrapping paper today - we did star potato stamps with stamping ink. the kids were like factory workers stamping away madly while i rolled the paper along the table. they really enjoyed it.                       
• i made some delicious soup this evening. i almost bought Covent Garden Butternut Squash and Sweet Potato soup and instead bought the ingredients to make some myself. here's how:

1. cut a medium-sized Butternut Squash in to four long quarters. Scrape out most of the seedy bit. Place on a baking tray and drizzle with oil. place 2 small whole sweet potatoes on the tray and bake the lot for 40 minutes.

2. meanwhile, in a saucepan, chop and saute a large onion and 3 cloves of garlic (slightly chopped/squashed) until the onion is transparent

3. cut the cooked squash in to chunks and add to the onions. squeeze the sweet potato out of it's skins in to the onions.

4. saute for a few minutes and then add 1/2 L of stock and simmer on low heat

5. add 1/2 tsp turmeric, 1/4 tsp ground pepper, 1/4 tsp mild curry powder, 1/4 tsp nutmeg

6. simmer for 10 minutes

7. add approx 8 fresh basil leaves and blend in to a smooth soup